Choosing Among Giftbasket Options
Giftbaskets are soooo last year! Or is it last decade? My fervent hope is that you’ll eventually come to the conclusion that both statements are wrong. I’m actually a gift food merchant. Kind of has a special ring to is, doesn’t it? While I agree that it’s not quite the same as being a test pilot or a neurosurgeon, it’s an honest way to pay for tuition for my grandson. Or at least it would be a good way to do so if more of you bought my products.
I know what you’re thinking: “All of his gift problems are solved; year in and year out everybody on his list gets stuck with another gift basket.” How dare you think about me in that way! I actually have the same problems you have in deciding what gift is best for everyone on my list.
I do not give food filled bundles of joy to my entire gift list. (Well, maybe most it.) Even if I did just give gift baskets to everyone, my choice would be only marginally easier than yours. At my Store, we offer scores of fruit baskets, gourmet meals, wine gift baskets and far more than that, even. (I can hear you right now, begging me to tell you where this wonderful store is. A little patience is called for on your part.)
Before you coerce me into giving away my store location, I want to share my own decision making strategy with you.
First, I decide on an appropriate category of gift. If Uncle Milton has his drinking problem under control for the first time in ten years, I should not even consider the wine baskets. Instead, I’ll opt for a fruit basket with something seasonal. After years of ignoring the nutritional value of what he consumed, he could use a few extra servings of fruit in solid form.
Dear, dear Aunt Mildred is a great wine talker. I don’t think she truly enjoys sipping her wine, but she loves to try to impress everyone with what she knows about it. She loves to let everyone know the best vintage years, the kinds of grapes that are used in various blends and, most of all, how much she spent on the wine you just spilled all over her new carpeting ($95 a square yard). She’ll get a simple wine gift basket, but I’m not going to spring for the champagne! (I’m also not going to pay for the Carpet cleaning; not after what that cat of hers did to my new coat.)
Everyone in our family, except me, says that my nephew Alfred finally made his girlfriend an honest woman. I, on the other hand, never doubted his girlfriend’s honesty, but I have some reasons to suspect Alfred. In any case, they finally got married. To tell you the truth, even I agree that it’s about time. Alfred spent the last eight years trying to decide if she was worth the cost of a diamond ring. (I suspect that he eventually settled on crystal, which, considering Alfred, would be thought of as generous.) Alfred always loves to receive cash as a gift. Well, he’s not getting that from me. Instead, they’re getting a meal of live lobsters and the trimmings from me. Actually two, of course. My thinking is that this is the only way to get his bride out of the kitchen. Alfred would never pay for a restaurant meal, so, in a sense, I’m sending the restaurant to them.
Second, I decide how much I’m willing to spend on these losers.
My grandson is getting the latest video game system. Let’s face it; he is truly special.